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Monday Ideas for School Counselors

Weekly articles for school counselors with ideas on how to resolve typical school situations with students, teachers and parents using the solution focused approach.

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Got Disrespectful Student: Tried Everything

February 13, 20232 min read

Valentine’s Day is tomorrow so this Monday Ideas is a gift to you and all of your staff.

I really believe that each of you...

  • Deserve to be respected for your passion about education

  • Deserve to be listened to, as you are wise

  • Deserve to see students engage and excel, as that is your purpose, every day

  • Deserve love

I also believe that...

  • Students have the skills to be experts

  • Students often can’t see or understand your great intentions

  • Students give up easily because they don’t believe in themselves

  • Students have not all experienced love

Last week I spoke to some amazing teachers in training at my university about the solution focused approach. They were student teachers who were experiencing some challenges, as all new teachers do and they were learning to handle challenges.

One student in particular, impressed me greatly. She spoke of a young fifth grader who was labeled as a real behavior issue. He had caused havoc in many classes. When the student teacher was a substitute one day, he remarked that she was a substitute so they did not need to listen to her. She tried several ways of getting him to comply with her teaching. Finally, she did something remarkable. She took her own values and personality and approached him differently:

She walked up to him privately and told him that she was not there to punish him, she wanted to get along with him. He was quiet as she spoke. She followed through with compliments when she could. She wondered if she had connected. There were no threats, no punishments, just a calm and friendly, yet loving demeanor. After that, there were no more issues with the student.

So, today, as an experiment, take your caring and loving attributes and spend five minutes during the first few minutes of class, and express to your class how important they are to you. 

Listen to this 2:21 minute song before you log out of this message. It is by the Beatles. It is called “The End.” Listen all the way through…

Valentine’s Day is tomorrow so this Monday Ideas is a gift to you.

I really believe that each of you...

  • Deserve to be respected for your passion about education

  • Deserve to be listened to, as you are wise

  • Deserve to see students engage and excel, as that is your purpose, every day

  • Deserve love

I also believe that...

  • Students have the skills to be experts

  • Students often can’t see or understand your great intentions

  • Students give up easily because they don’t believe in themselves

  • Students have not all experienced love

Happy Valentine’s Day.

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Dr Linda Metcalf

Linda Metcalf is the best-selling author of Counseling Toward Solutions and 10 other books. Linda is a former middle school teacher, all-level certified school counselor, licensed professional counselor supervisor, and licensed marriage and family therapist in the State of Texas. She is a Professor at Texas Wesleyan University.

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