Ending School Violence Without Barbed Wire

How safe do you feel in your school?

Ever glance with concern at the parking lot when you walk up to the school entrance?

Do you sometimes nervously jerk when you hear a loud noise in the hallway?

When you see kids fighting in the school lunchroom and things start flying - do you ever duck behind a table so you don’t get hit? 

These are the types of thoughts educators experience every day, and its thoughts like these that keep them from loving their job.

I say it’s time we suspended “violence” from our schools!

Are you ready?

Imagine a school where school violence doesn’t stand a chance. Not because there are barbed wired fences, bullet proof windows or armed resource officers or teachers. It’s because the climate in the school reeks of respect. It is… everywhere.

Respect in the form of words, actions, emotions and encouragement. No matter who you are or what your previous reputation was, in this school, you are loved anyway. And as a result, students love coming to school. They don’t let violence in the school door.

In this school, students respect teachers because the teachers tell them that they are liked, important, have a future, and teachers find ways to teach them, so the students excel. In this school, administrators are more of a coach, rather than a disciplinarian, cheering on students who get off track, so the students only see the finish line. They have policies to follow, sure, and there are rules, but following those policies and rules is not hard because the students feel the value in every interaction they have with school staff, and they want to be there.

This school didn’t spend tons of money on security, although the school is physically secure. The locks work, sure.

This school spent their money on helping their teachers build new skills and learn how to engage every student… even students that other schools would have thrown away.  And because of knowing how to engage those students, the teachers love their jobs, the students feel their passion and as a result, the passion is contagious, and the students catch it.

Yes, I am a dreamer. 

Yes, I am writing this because I know a school like this can exist... because they do exist. Across our world, when school staff have better information that broadens their skills so they can reach challenging students, this violence-free school can exist and it does… in the US, South Africa, Ireland, Australia and more… there are solution focused schools and they are violence-free.

What does it take to get there?

A new mindset where all students are seen as experts and all school staff are detectives, on the hunt for what works in teaching, relating and seeing beyond their assumptions.

It takes looking into the eyes of a young human, despite their hardships, and attitudes and believing that the human staring back at you needs you desperately. 

Creating a violence-free school isn’t about ignoring real safety concerns - that is important! It’s about proactively building a culture where violence has no place. It starts with daily actions, shifts in mindset, and a commitment from all of us.

Are you ready to take the first step?  

This week, as you encounter a child or adolescent who is challenging, and you hear others describing them with words that sting your heart, go find that young human and try this:

If you're a Teacher:  Check in with that student who just does not engage and don’t give up until you have a conversation that relays to the student that he/she matters to you!

If you're an Administrator:  With one student this week, after you lay out a consequence, shift to a conversation where you tell the student he/she matters to you.  Then, together, discuss what the student might need from you and his teachers to stay out of your office. Then find the student when he is not in your office and do a high 5.

If you're a School Counselor: Maintain your commitment to see beyond behaviors and failures and dig for times when things were better for the student. Offer to connect with teachers and parents about the things the student says would be helpful.

Then do it.

Just connect.